At this time, exactly three years ago, someone I had just met told me that you may never do the things that other children do. They watched you play and wrote things down on clipboards. They asked me questions about when you walked, when you talked, about what you like and dislike. They watched videos… Read More
At 3.08 am, I hear your first scream. The fluorescent light from the cabin bathroom is flickering unpleasantly, giving the cramped room a strange, nightmarish quality – but we cannot turn off the lights or you will not sleep at all. “Sweetheart – everything is okay. You are safe. We are on the big boat.”… Read More
Sometimes, when we need shopping mid-week, we tie it in with tea time and the children pick a meal in the supermarket café. For them, it is a dizzying experience, provoking jumps of joy and jubilant chanting. In the last six months, we have been three times. The first time, in the winter, they did… Read More
Over the course of our first year in school, many people have been charged with the care, education and welfare of my son. There are his classroom teachers, of course, and his permanent one-to-one TA, and other members of staff who deal with him frequently. These people know him well and the vast majority know… Read More
This time last year, we were frantically collecting evidence for an EHCP assessment. We were buying uniform, arranging visits, trying to liaise with school and nursery. We needed to arrange a transition that would make things as smooth as they could be. September was looming, a great immovable block – I could not see past… Read More
I usually read quite quickly. As a child, I devoured books. They were friends, an escape. One summer I read eighty-six books in the six-week Summer break. And I loved every minute of the time I spent with them. These days, I read much, much less. With a busy work schedule and two small children,… Read More
I have been worried my whole life. Fear is my constant companion. As soon as I was old enough to know that pain and death existed, I feared for the times when they would happen to me. When I had children, this worsened – there was so much more to lose. The worry is always… Read More
If I were to tell you that I was suffering from post-natal depression, you may feel a little awkward about what to say. Some subjects in our society are still taboo and another person’s suffering is always hard to navigate. When I lost a baby at 10 weeks, the people I told had mixed reactions.… Read More
Every morning, the boys and girls in your class write their names on the lunch lists. There are dozens of names, with mismatched letters, curling around the edges of the paper. The letters are uneven. Some are huge, some small. ‘D’s and ‘B’s are back to front. Lower case and capitals dance on the page,… Read More
Little boy, few weeks ago, your teachers suggested that we could do some extra things to help you develop your gross motor skills. Perhaps, we could try soft play, take you to more adventure parks. Even a little may help. PE, you see, is such a difficult part of your week. More often than not,… Read More
Little boy, when you flap, when you grimace, when you contort your body into strange shapes and trot on your toes, some people do not know how to react. Some people, my love, have not heard of stimming. When you twist your hands in front of your face and warp your mouth and scrunch up your… Read More
The internet makes it straightforward for us to believe certain things. It is easy to confirm our biases, to surround ourselves with people and information that correspond with our own views. It has never been so easy to judge others – from behind a keyboard we see a little snippet of the story, a mere… Read More