No Apologies – you don’t have to say sorry for autism

Boy with autism in a field

You ask me “Does your eldest child have autism?”

“Yes.” I reply.

“I’m so sorry.”

My stomach lurches. No. Please.  Don’t say you are sorry. I know you mean well. I was once like you. But don’t apologise for the gift that is my boy – for any part of him. I know that the pain and suffering of children is the world’s greatest sorrow, but it is not autism that causes him pain.

I used to think a child with any disability must be a tragedy. I used to think that the parents of such children must long for them to be whole. But your idea of wholeness is skewed by what you are, by what you know. Birds cannot breathe underwater. Fish cannot fly in the sky. We do not spend our time lamenting the lack of ability in either. Nor do we assume that the fishes long to fly, or that birds feel incomplete, soaring through the air.

Fish flounder and writhe on the shore not because they are fish – but for the absence of water.

I know you want to express something – you are compelled to respond, to show you care. I know that it is a subject that makes those without experience awkward and uncomfortable. You fear to offend and an apology is simple, closed. It risks no further chance of misstep. I am not offended but please – let me explain.

My boy cannot run, jump and climb like other boys.  He cannot dress himself or drink from a cup. Simple tasks we take for granted require great effort.

But he can list the wonders of the solar system, in perfect order. Planets and moons and stars roll off his tongue. They must all be perfect. Io and Ganymede and Calisto and Europa. His perception of them is governed by rules that are as absolute as the rules of the universe that make them spin. His rules must be flawless, predictable – like gravity. And they are just as beautiful, in their perfection.

My boy finds it hard to communicate. He has vocabulary – but the mysteries of interaction and communication must be learned, slowly, painfully. They will never come naturally. Sometimes he cannot tell me what he needs and his frustration and despair tumble out of control.

But he loves music. He relates to the sounds of instruments more than lyrics and voices. He mimics the drums and the bass guitar and will tell me which instrument is which, his whole body tense with joy as he imitates them. Listening, singing, dancing –they are not enough. He longs to be the music.

My boy cannot cope with disorder. The pressures of unpredictability take an awful toll. When there are changes, he is lost to me, in anger, terror, or blankness. I do not know which is hardest to watch. But I know it is my privilege to hold him, to protect him, to wait – until he comes back.

He is acutely honest. He is sensitive. He is loving. When I ask him how much I love him, the answer is always “Do you love me as much as the whole world mummy?” and I must always reply, “Even more than that, gorgeous boy.”

He adores word games and strange vocabulary and the absurd. Deliberately muddling words will make him laugh until he shakes. He loves to make his baby sister giggle. I have known no purer joy than watching the delight, mirrored in their faces.

He is perfect.

So, if you must feel sorry, feel sorry for those who do not see what I see. Feel sorry that the world is set up for fish, when he is bird. Feel sorry for those that will shun him, or fail to understand him, or even mock him  – for strengths and weaknesses that seem so different to their own.

It is their loss, their tragedy. For their perception that he is less, that he needs an apology, is based standards that are not real. They are an illusion that seems real because the rest of us make it so by our actions, our attitudes.

You do not know what to say. And so you say sorry. You say, I don’t know how you do it. You say, you must be so strong.  But my child is not a burden. He is the light of my life. And he would be yours too, if he were your child. Strength flows like water, for those we love. Yours. Mine. My spirit and resilience are no greater than yours.

So if you feel an apology about to escape your lips, stay silent. Or ask, instead, what is he like? What does he love? What makes him smile? What makes him laugh until he shakes?

Because I cannot, and will not, be sorry for any inch of him.


To learn more about our experiences with autism, you may like to read ‘Autism? More like bad parenting‘ or ‘Autism with imagination and affection.’


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87 thoughts on “No Apologies – you don’t have to say sorry for autism

  1. You are so right not to be sorry because he is perfect as he is and he is a beautiful little lad! I think people say that because they clearly don’t understand and they are scared of the word ‘autism’. Loving this post. Off to share it now #bigpinklink #KCACOLS

  2. I understand what you say. I used to feel the same. However 13 years down the road, I have realised autism is certainly not a gift,not in anyway at all. We tell ourselves it it,tell the world it is and for as long as possible try to believe it is.The sad truth is its at very best a hindrance. There are two paths, both leading to the same destination. One path is clear and can be skipped along.The other is boggy and the user must wade through mud often waist deep at a very slow hard pace just to keep moving. Which would you chose for your child? The child with autism is wading constantly just to be. That’s not a gift. It’s scary,it’s unfair. The fights you will encounter with education,ignorance,health and exhaustion teach you autism is anything but a gift. I work tirelessly with my son to make him the best he can be. 24/7 home educating not only because the education system is inept with regards to ASD but because I know I’m running against the clock.A clock that’s ticking too fast.Inneed to teach him how to survive in the real world when I’m gone. Quirky reciting of the solar system helps You believe the child is clever,quells the fear.its something they are better at than their peers. Your post made me very sad.

    1. I never said it was a gift. I said he was a gift. I said that it doesn’t need an apology. There will be very difficult challenges, I know. And you describe him ‘quirkily’ relating the solar system as quelling some fear in me that he is not clever but you seem to misunderstand my point. Whether he is clever or not is neither here nor there. He takes great joy in it and his joy is my joy. I can feel sad that autism will make some things difficult but wishing it away is a complex idea that I can’t really get on board with. It is part of him. I can’t wish away parts of him, however challenging they may be. Thanks for commenting.

    2. I don’t understand why this post would make you feel sad. And why bother question his cleverness? Why not value that cleverness and the joy it brings even if it hasn’t yet carried over to other topics/concepts? The troubles you listed are people’s/institutions’ inadequate and poor response to autism- not a direct reflection of autism itself. The response of the world, including instituations such as school, is the issue- not the child with autism. We need a world that values difference instead of shunning it, fearing it.

    3. There are two paths? I don’t get it….Mainly because I am autistic. I happen to like mud and life is hard with or without being autistic. How are you teaching him about the “real world”? Are you teaching him that his autism is more of a burden then a gift that should be used to better himself and society. Don’t get me wrong I am a Soldier and am going to medical school and its a challenge. but what makes me unique is that I own my autism and not my autism owning me. My 5 yr old son is also autistic and I wouldn’t change him for the world. I would however like to kick the crap out of the ignorant parents who teach their kids to be ignorant of people who are different. look at some of the most successful people in history who had autism like I don’t know Thomas Edison the guy who created the light above your head. The creator of pokemon is autistic. Who knows maybe the ladies son gets fascinated with the solar system so much that he comes up with the idea to get all humans the ability to travel the solar system. instead of complaining how about encouraging the potential in our kids.

    4. You are describing the Social Model of Disability, and ought to know the term for it. Just because the systems do not fit, does not mean that they are fixed like that forever. More honesty and understanding the better.
      I’ve been through a lot of shit in my life (sugar-coating it won’t help and I owe NO ONE that privilege including my mother as trying to do so left me severely burnt-out).
      I’ve been accused of playing the victim etc. Wrong. I don’t want sympathy. That’s a manipulative device. I want EMPATHY. Not even that, I want functional UNDERSTANDING. Then and only then, can people learn. Learning is what makes us human, as opposed to being relatively-pathetic animals who flounder around enslaved to instinct (no offense to animals who unlike intransigent humans cannot be blamed for their limitations).
      However, the mob mentality and in-group limited psychology I’ve experienced group abuse from, suggests that lots of people are too ignorant to take this human-vs-animal distinction seriously.
      Including those arseholes in the NHS who will sit there and say (5 whole years before I finally got a diagnosis from a bloody trainee, quality level of care, that): “some people can’t be helped.” Not “some people are made different and need different help”. Just pure ignorance. This idiot clinical psychologist didn’t bother to elaborate, so that I could LEARN where to start investigating. I only had about 5 major comorbid psychological disorders on TOP of the undiagnosed AS, as well as multiple others, and myriad physical ailments that I’d learnt to ignore because the NHS doesn’t bloody listen (a good way to save money is to ignore others’ pain, I guess). No need to be efficient or anything, noooooo.
      These arseholes lie to themselves about their clinical competence and professional ethical standards every waking moment of their lives, and it’s a disgrace, I’ve seen it multiple times over geographical areas and different human demographics, so it’s a trend and a culture. Then these tax-thieves play the victim about how hard they have it. Go on strike, then! Take risks to lose your job and leverage pressure to change things forever, then. Too selfish and all sorts of excuses, all based in fear? Shut up then, bunch of pussies. Some of us have serious impedences to our lives and goals, and to watch people lie from positions of privilege is disgusting. The NHS is a sacred cow that it is taboo to criticise. It is setting itself up for Privatisation to look like a good option (which I guess is the conspiracy at play here since New Labour era and earlier).
      It is the AS (out-group) who need to be the ones to show people the truth. Of course, people need to be capable of hearing it.
      Recent Election result suggests that they’re pretty damned far from that, incidentally.
      We need AS unity NOW.
      How? (and on that note, thanks for the blog).

  3. It wouldn’t be wishing part of him would be wishing he was on the path he could skip along. The one without the mud.Don’t get me wrong I adore my child,he is an incredible individual but my word I wish it was easier for him. My reply came from my guts,it wasn’t intended to offend. There will be times over the coming years you will have days where you know exactly what I mean

    1. We have already had many difficult days. The path with the mud is hard because of society, not the autism itself. That was a main part of the piece. I am not offended. It just seems you haven’t quite got my point. I am not foolish enough to think that life is going to be easy – it’s already not easy. He was diagnosed at 2. But E brings me joy from all aspects of his personality- and some of those are a direct result of autism. So how can I truly hate it or wish it completely away? I can’t. I can wish life was easier for him. But it is society that makes life the hardest, not autism, a lot of the time.

    1. Thank you so much. I know there are challenges and I don’t mean to play them down or belittle them. I just wanted to address the idea that he is any less a person, any less a love of my life because of his autism. x

  4. My so was diagnosed at 3 I had no idea of the challenges that lay ahead. Yes society plays a huge part in how difficult life can be,with lack of suitable educational provision,lack of staff training in all professional fields and general ignorance in society.However,autism itself is extremely debilitating,more so the older the child becomes.The gulf between them and their peers becomes glaring,the things they cant and will never do so much more obvious. We can’t live with what ifs and if onlys but I would take away my child’s autism in an instant,without hesitation

    1. I think it’s very unfair to assume I only feel this way because I am naive and I will no longer feel this way in a few years – I will. I know it in my bones. My child is not your child. My journey is not your journey. I am very sorry that the difficult times have left you feeling so negative. I am not trying to play down or shy away from the difficulties autism brings. I am simply taking joy in every facet of my child because both by children, autistic and neurotypical, are the greatest gifts I have ever received.

  5. Beautiful post! My son is 10 and has had a diagnosis since he was 5! I battled for 3 years to get him in the right school setting and that was really hard. Not hard because of my son or his autism but hard because of incompetent professionals and schools that have no understanding. I wouldn’t change my son for the world. He has had struggles buy I was there to guide him. In his 10 years of life he has never brought me down. He is an incredible human being with so much love in his heart. I have had the “I’m sorry” too on many occasions. Keep doing what you do and thanks for the beautiful post. Xx

    1. Thanks so much for commenting and your kind words. Your son sounds like a wonderful boy, like mine. x

  6. He’s wonderful and so are you. It’s tough, I think people just don’t know what to say sometimes and then they inevitably say the wrong thing. It’s nothing personal, just that general human awkwardness that we all share. #KCACOLS

    1. Thank you. I do know that people are unsure what to say. I guess that’s why I wanted to write about it – so they get a little insight into the other side. Thanks so much for commenting. 🙂

  7. This is such a lovely, uplifting post. I haven’t had much experience with autism, so I would be one of those who wouldn’t know what to say, but I hope I wouldn’t say sorry. #KCACOLS

    1. Thank you. I do understand that it’s awkward. I would have been the same before! But I think just a “What is he like?” Or anything that shows interest is a good response 🙂

  8. What a beautiful post. You have a magical way with words. I hope that parents facing diagnosis and feeling scared and worried for the future read this because it’s a wonderful positive piece. Thanks for being a #bigpinklink

  9. What a beautiful post. Moved me to tears. Your boy is so lucky to have you and see him even when this world does not x

  10. Life is hard for EVERYONE, with or without Autsim. No ones life is a perfect journey. We all face hardships, fear, illness and loneliness but we all also have great moments of happiness, love, friendship and joy. I believe life is what you make it. You can hide away in a corner and complain and wish things were different or you can say sod it and embrace it all, good and bad. I know which one I would pick (and I do). All I’m trying to say is that all life is a wonderful blessing filled with hardships – we all have that in common regardless. 💜

    1. Very well said. There’s always someone worse off and there’s always something to feel joyful about if you are looking for it. Thanks so much for commenting 😊

  11. I was the kid with autism, and now a grown-up with kids of my own, and my mom was (and is) like you. And that made all the difference. For no matter how difficult it seemed to be, how complicated life sometimes was, she stayed positive and looked at my possibilities and loved me for who I was and am. I am married now, with two kids of my own and try to pay forward all the positiveness I received. Thank you for writing your experience and joy down so wonderfully!

    1. Thank you so much for commenting and for sharing your story too. Hearing the experiences of those with autism reinforces my positive attitude too 🙂

  12. Everyone is different and I agree people shouldn’t say Im sorry because he is not less or something to be sorry about; he is your little man, autism is not something he or you can change, if someone said what’s your child and you said a boy its the same as saying sorry for that. A beautiful post about a mothers love for her son..x #biglinklink

  13. As you have said, most of us are compelled to say ‘I am sorry’ because our illusion is your must be suffering but you’re not. You’ve embraced the wonderfulness that’s you son. Great post

  14. Such a beautiful post and words. It was lovely to get a little insight about your gorgeous boy. It would never occur to me to say ‘sorry’, it seems strange to me that is what people say to you. Maybe it’s because my best friend had a disabled sister when I was little, I don’t know. But, I see everyone for who they are x

    1. Thank you so much for such a lovely comment. I think personal experience really does help a lot. X

  15. I think this is so, so beautiful. The way you describe your son and how much love I can see in those words… It’s inspiring. YOU are inspiring, just as your wonderful boy is too.

  16. Wow amazingly well written. I don’t have any experience at all, but your post really touched me. I’m pretty sure I have been one of those “I’m sorry” people but this has really made me think. Thank you #KCACOLS

  17. Oh wow, what an absolutely beautiful piece. I love reading your blog as I get to know more about your special little guy-and what an honor it would be to know him like you do. Your love for your son is tangible in this article, his spirit truly sounds infectious. Autism is difficult, it really is, but isn’t life? You sound like such a wonderful mother <3 #KCACOLS

  18. I love this post and I know exactly where you are coming from. I’ve been there at both ends, when my eldest was diagnosed it felt like the worst thing in the world, that I’d lost my son to some awful condition that would take away the life I expected him to lead. In a way it did, but he has also astounded me with the things he’s managed to do. I think once I stopped thinking of his autism as being the thing that was holding him back and destroying his life, and just accepted that he was that way and we were going to make the best of it, things got a whole heap better. He’s and adult now, he’s still autistic but he’s done some wonderful things in his life. I am and always will be proud of him and love him for who he is, he has autism, he is not autism. He is certainly a blessing in my life (yes, even when he thinks it’s ok to ask me a question at 4am.)

  19. He sounds like a wonderful boy with a wonderful mom. As an adult Aspie myself, I feel just as you do. Don’t expect this fish to fly and we’ll all be fine. Thanks for your enlightened words. All the best to you, and your son, and your family!

  20. I love this post, he sounds like an absolute blessing and nobody should ever be sorry for that!! I think autism can be very misunderstood, I know that there is such a wide spectrum that often people are confused about it as knowing one autistic child doesn’t mean that you know another. #KCACOLS

  21. <3 Our boys are similar. My boy loves the solar system, periodic table, countries on the world map, alphabet, flags, states and capitals of the USA ( 🙂 we live in New Zealand). For all the things he can't do there are many he can do that blows others away…. He is starting school on Monday. :-).

  22. This just made me cry….exactly what my son goes thru is stated here….just couldnt agree more….people need to mind their own bloody business….its a gift…a pure which God chise only special people to present it… just gently love it and enjoy it….nobody deserves such acceptance than ourselves…..

  23. I truly enjoyed your post.
    I have a great nephew and he’s the pride and joy of his family.
    Could not be loved more.
    Thanks for the insight.

  24. Thank you so much for articulating something so difficult so well. My wife and I have spent the past two years wading through the (relatively) unknown as we attempted to get a proper diagnosis for our son. He is about as gentle and sweet as possible and is, in many ways, a treat to deal with by comparison to his sister, a “neuro-typical” young lady. They are both beautiful gifts in their own way and your statement about seeing your children’s faces mirroring each other stopped me dead in my tracks with tears in my eyes – there’s nothing more beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing this. You make a difference.

  25. Wow! I am shedding tears reading this because you took the words right out of my mouth regarding how I feel about my own son! Thank you for this! As he gets ready to enter high school next month, some fears have crept up on me and reading this has helped alleviate those fears. I really enjoyed reading this:)

  26. To the best of my knowledge, I’ve never said “I’m sorry” to a parent whose child has some sort of difference from what society deems ‘normal’. It is not my place to offer condolences for something when sorrow has not been expressed. I hope that I am positive and upbeat when I meet these children and try to ask some type of question like those you suggest. I hope that others learn from your post that blessings come in many packages and that blessings are something to be joyful about, not sorry for. As long as you feel blessed, he will be happy, because he will always feel that positivity from you. Good Job, Mama!

  27. Thank you for sharing. My husband and I go back and forth on this topic. Our son is 9 and struggles like at ASD kids do but we try to see his differences as strengths and have taught him to be proud of himself, autism and all.

    My husband is also autistic and didn’t have any support as a child and we are determined to make things better for Lyric, our wonderful Aspie.

  28. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and your son with us. My grandson is 5 and has Autism. When someone writes so well about how others react regarding Autism, it is an opportunity to educate others so they have a better understanding. Your comments were shared with me by my daughter and I in turn will share with others so that they have an opportunity to understand. Your son is lucky to have you as his Mommy. My grandson is lucky to have his Mommy as well. Lots of love. A grandmother who adores her grandson.

  29. I do believe each and every child comes with challenges these are mostly ours as parents to help find what makes them happy what makes them sad and what ways to help them learn and how to cope in this world . I have never met a child that was not wonderful in their own special way . I have been so blessed to have 5 children of my own and then was able to work with many children each week to teach them dance ; the funny part is if you really get to know children they have so much to teach us ! It is hard to know what to say in so many situations ; I know I have been guilty myself of this feeling ; I also lost a beautiful son and husband in a terrible plane accident .I also lost my own health to some awful diseases , and even though a lot of people don’t know what to say or do I always appreciate them caring enough to try ! Lots of love to all you parents out. There trying to do your best of raising your children to be a part of making our world a better place 🌎☀️⭐️

  30. Thank you for this beautiful post. The many times I am frustrated for my son (also with ASD) is because I am trying always to prepare him to cope in a world of fish when he is, like your son, a beautiful bird. And I am always saddened by most of the people around me and their refusal to see his beauty and what makes him shine. So many of my seemingly “open minded” and “loving” friends shy away from even asking me about my son and enjoying his world. I have two other neurotypical kids and they forever ask me about them, because it is “safe.” Anyway, I’m rambling…but I wanted to thank you and tell you I get it! Peace to you and your family!

  31. I love this! My oldest son has autism, he is 18 and going to college this fall and I have 3 other sons without autism. You are not naive. When he was younger, I felt like I had to wait to be happy until he got “better”. I would work and work and make him “better” and then I could start living and enjoying. Then I realized that he might never be “better” in the sense that I expected. I started accepting him as he was. I let myself be happy and joyful even if he never got “better”. And at that point things changed. We all got happier. It doesn’t mean we don’t work hard or do ten thousand kinds of therapy, it just means that I don’t expect him to suddenly wake up one day and not have autism. He will always have autism and he likes it about himself. We try to work with his strengths. Of course we get frustrated, he gets frustrated, he struggles way more than my other sons. He needs much more support than them, but that is OK. I think it is so important to focus on the positive and that is exactly what you are doing. He has changed me and my husband and his siblings. We are “better” because we know him. We are richer because we spend time with him. We are blessed.

  32. I loved your essay! My son’s Aspergers diagnosis is recent, but we’ve known he’s a bird in a world of fish almost since birth. Since his diagnosis, I’ve been reading a lot about neurodiversity and the strengths and weaknesses that come on the autism spectrum as well as other types of neurodiversity- ‘disorders’ that create many challenges while the unique abilities that come with them are hidden or overlooked. ADHD can cause impulsivity and a struggle to stay in one place, but can also come with boundless energy and inventiveness. Bipolar disorder can be crippling, but often comes with creativity, that when unlocked can enrich the world. I loved these quotes: “No. Please. Don’t say you are sorry…your idea of wholeness is skewed by what you are, by what you know. Birds cannot breathe underwater. Fish cannot fly in the sky. We do not spend our time lamenting the lack of ability in either. Nor do we assume that the fishes long to fly, or that birds feel incomplete, soaring through the air…So, if you must feel sorry, feel sorry for those who do not see what I see. Feel sorry that the world is set up for fish, when he is bird. Feel sorry for those that will shun him, or fail to understand him, or even mock him – for strengths and weaknesses that seem so different to their own.” Often, neurodiversity’s greatest gift is that it helps us see each other’s gifts. It helps the ‘fish’ see the beauty in flying.

  33. Great blog. I have two adopted children, my son has attachment disorder which can make him ‘interesting’ to parent and teach. A big turning point for me was to stop apologising about him and start challenging the assumptions people made about his behaviour. It was very liberating and the result is he knows we’re always 100% on his side. Very best wishes Nicx

    1. You have. All comments get sent to me for approval before being visible. Depends when I get on to approve them! Thanks so much for commenting and for your kind words 🙂

  34. I think that people say ‘I’m sorry’, because they’re not sure what else to say, so thank you for writing this and giving some insight into what could be said instead. I love your attitude, and the love you have for your son is so plain to see, he really is a gift. x #KCACOLS

  35. Oh! This is heartbreaking and enlightening and full of so much love and pride. Thank you for sharing and thank you for your words. Your son is perfect in a stinky imperfect world.

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  37. Thank you for this beautifully written post. I often have problems with our overuse of “I’m sorry”. It can only be truly meant when someone has caused hurt. In Spanish, people say “lo siento” which directly translates as “I feel it” which helps convey a sense of empathy and understanding.

  38. The thing I love most about children is their ability to be different without being aware of it, not affected by stereotypes or boxes that define them according to the ‘guidelines’. It’s a shame that as we grow up we become aware and try and fit in. I think we can all take something from this and remember we are different too. Your son sounds so lovely, thank you for making me more aware of this x

  39. It was lovely to read about the things that your son enjoys and loves. So often people assume that autism is wholly negative but you have proved so well through your writing that this is simply not the case. Thanks so much for hosting #Spectrumsunday

  40. when someone tells you something and you don’t know how to respond, it’s automatic just to say something/anything. I skim over our eldest child when meeting people for the first time, ‘yeah we have 1 girl, 4 boys and quickly move onto something else’, I’m not embarrassed/ashamed but I don’t want to go into every detail and answer every question when they ask too many questions and you’re stuck with either lying or having long conversations with people you’ll never meet again.

  41. I got goosebumps as I read your post. – especially the comment about not apologising for the gift that is your son.

    I can spend hours watching my own gift spend hours in his head – and celebrating the many things that other parents sometimes take for granted.


  42. I love the wonders of the Solar System, word games, strange words, the absurd and music. I have a huge vocabulary, actually I am bilingual, but I’m not good at communicating. There are simple tasks I find hard to do, like answering the phone or touching butter, but I know what kinds of quarks compose protons and neutrons.
    People often misunderstand me, they often think I would be happier if I were like them instead of being the way I am. But I don’t feel sad. I feel perfect. When I’m sad, it’s not because of the way I am, it is because of the way people treat me, or because of random life events. I am very proud of myself. I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me because there is nothing to be sorry about.
    I think I may have Asperger’s but I don’t have a diagnosis. Anyway, autistic or not, I can relate to your boy. And I am not sorry for him. I am happy for him, because he knows the wonders of the Solar System and the beauty of the stars, because he can feel the music, because he sees words are not only sequences of letters.
    I think you may like the poem “The Albatross” by Charles Baudelaire. I usually don’t like poetry but there’s a few exception. The poem talks about a poet, but it could as well talk about different minds in general.

  43. My middle child, a younger sister, was diagnosed with ASD in September ’13 when she was six and a half. Her older sister was diagnosed with ASD (Asperger’s Syndrome) and ADD in September ’14, just before she turned nine. Their younger brother was diagnosed with ASD (Asperger’s Syndrome) in September ’15 just after he’d turned seven. They are three wonderful, but sometime annoying, children. They experience the world in a different way to myself, their father and each other.

    They have shown just how wonderful over the last month and a half. I suffered a mild stroke which has left me with a field of vision loss. I now can not drive, but they’ve understood and taken changes in routine really well.

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