Just Us Two #1



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For some time now, I have been painfully aware of how rarely either one of my children gets my undivided attention.

My daughter is a second child and her brother has recently been diagnosed as being on the autistic spectrum. She has not had the wholehearted newborn adorationΒ her brother received. She has never been the sole object of mummy’s hopes and dreams, the single anchor of mummy’s universe; she has always held that title jointly.

My son has a baby sister who has just turned one and a mummy who strains to meet the demands of two small children and a teaching job. He is still struggling, every day, to come to terms with the changes his sister’s presence brings. She is a vociferous and capricious element in a world he wants – needs – to be certain and predictable.

So I have decided, each weekend, I am going to alternate taking one of my children to do an activity with me alone, just us two, while daddy takes the other. I will then relate the most precious moments and photos from these times in a monthly series called ‘Just Us Two’. This is the first of that series.

Just Us Two #1 – 30.01.2016Β 

Today, we went to the park, my son and I, just us two.

I bundled you up in your jumper, sturdy boots and puddlesuit and we set off hand in hand, out into the sunny morning.

We walked together and you told me the colours of the cars you could see, the colour of the sky. As we arrived, you noted the football match taking place on the park field and your face lit up.

We explored the train and the playhouse and the swings and roundabouts, your feet and waterproof drenched with moisture as you made your way through the huge puddles.

Sometimes, you were sad. The slide was too fast, another boy was in the playhouse that you needed to be just for you, “not together.” I glanced apologetically at his mother and she met my look with an understanding smile.

But you were mostly happy. You ran along the path and round and round and you called me to look at things and got wet and out of breath, your cheeks flushing with exertion and excitement.

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This day will never come again. These moments have already passed. And so I will record them here so that I might remember the day we went to the park, just us two.

Your childish shouts mixing with the deeper voices of the men playing football on the field over the way.

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The way the sunlight made our shadows stretch.

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The way your delight and terror were writ large on your face, changing in an instant, the way childish emotions are wont to do.

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The way you love to make things spin.

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Your curiosity as you inspected each new piece of equipment as if it were new. We have not been to the park since the Summer and that must now be a dim memory for you.

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The bright colours, the chill in the air, your warm hand in mine, and how much I love you, little boy, and how much I loved our time, just us two.

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  1. 1
    Angela Milnes

    What a lovely post and a nice memory to record. I took tons of photos and recorded a lot of my daughters early years before I got into blogging and now i can record online. It’s such a great thing to do!

  2. 7

    Such a touching post, I do not yet have kids but I am sure it js difficult at times to give each child for attention and I am sure having such weekends will be awesome for you and your family

  3. 9
    Ana De Jesus

    This was a beautiful exploration of the bond between mother and child and your right it can be difficult to divide your attention but I think you are doing a great job. I like the idea of alternating between children.

  4. 13

    Aww this is a lovely post and something I will have to consider when we have our second child in a few months time. It must be difficult to juggle everything. I already struggle so with two!! However I love this idea and will be making sure after the initial routine I will be making time for my first for our little outings/quality time. Thank you for the inspiration x

  5. 16
    Hot Pink Wellingtons

    This is such a lovely post, just beautiful. It looks like your son had a great time and loved having you to himself. Such a nice idea to make sure you get that one on one time with both children – I just have the one and it’s difficult enough to find time for everything!

  6. 19
    Picking Up Toys

    Such a lovely post,having 3 I’m also painfully aware that my daughter seems to get more attention being the youngest and the one that kicks,screams and shows off.I do try and make time to sit and play Minecraft with the middle one and watch a film with the teen.It’s hard to fit everything is sometimes though isn’t it?Gorgeous pics too x #kcacols

  7. 25

    Lovely post.
    My son is autistic too but his siblings are all grown up and live away so he has me all to himself. I love spending time with him and I treasure each moment. Love the photographs. πŸ™‚ #abitofeverything

  8. 27
    A Moment with Franca

    This is so lovely and I really good idea. I also thing that we should spend some time individually with our kids. SInce I had my second daughter I felt that I have been given priority to her and my attention is not the same to my eldest daughter anymore. I feel sad about that because she is 5 and she realises I think. Now that the little one is finally at nursery I can go and pick up Bella from school and have all the journey back home together and just us. So it is really nice to feel that I can now give more time to my eldest. It is just priceless!! Thanks lovely for sharing this at #KCACOLS. I would love to see you again on Sunday! πŸ™‚ x

  9. 28

    Some lovely moments to share together πŸ™‚ what a lovely way to look back and remember, Thanks so much for linking up to #KCACOLS this week!

  10. 29
    Catie: Imperfect Mum

    I absolutely love your writing style. This is do beautifully written that the love you have for your son shines through. My son used to love things spinning too. What a beautiful series and how special that you are going to give your children this perfect gift of time! I hope to see you again next week at #FamilyFun. Thank you for linking up. I really enjoyed reading this.

    • 30
      Someone's Mum

      Aww thank you so much πŸ™‚ Definitely will the next time I have a related post. There’s a few ‘serious issue’ type ones coming up next week though! πŸ˜‰ Thanks for your lovely comments. x

  11. 32
    Bear and Cardigan

    What a fantastic idea and this post brought a lump to my throat! I’m sure as parents we all worry too much about the attention that our children get. That our precious first born has to suddenly share our attention. This is a wonderful way to give each child some special time, not only with you but their father too. #FamilyFun

  12. 34
    Sarah (@the_mindfulmama)

    Ah, what a beautiful post. And there’s so much stuff in there about being mindful too! I’m trying to pay attention to those ‘little’ moments when I’m with my boys and try to get them involved e.g. ‘what can you hear?’, ‘what does that cloud look like?’ so they’re more aware of what’s around them.

    I had a lovely walk with my youngest the other day – he was on his balance bike and I made sure that I spent a few seconds every now and then just focusing on that moment. It’s so hard when your mind is also vying for your attention with lots of thoughs of the past and what you’ll be doing next.

    I think you’re doing a lovely thing for your kids to try and give them some undivided mummy time regularly. I must try more of that myself πŸ™‚

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